


My circle of fears

by pyrus_pyrifolia



Category: Ghost (Sweden Band)
Genre: Angst, Chaptered, Feelings, M/M, Major Character Injury, Mates, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sexy Times, Spirits, Supernatural Elements, Trauma, ghouls are weird
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:33:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28051710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pyrus_pyrifolia/pseuds/pyrus_pyrifolia
Summary: Ghouls were creatures from Hell, owning supernatural abilities. Sometimes, a greater force makes their life hard. Alpha gets close to losing his mate, and he has to go on a quest to save Omega's soul and bring him back.
Relationships: Fire Ghoul | Alpha Ghoul/Omega | Quintessence Ghoul
Comments: 5
Kudos: 9





	My circle of fears

**Author's Note:**

> I am very thankful for @TECHNIKITTY02 who edited this for me, and added a lot to this chapter, @ifyouhaveghouls for encouaring me. I'm also thankful for the undying support of my friends. <3

Having a mate was a beautiful feeling. Having another soul to match your own, to be balanced out, to be a half of the whole. To be devoted to someone, to do whatever it took for them, even putting your very own life at risk. To have someone who kept your everlasting flame alive and burning when it was needed, or to control and wrangle it when you couldn't. Having a mate IS that beautiful, Alpha thinks, and he is the luckiest ghoul, because he has the most amazing mate. A sweet, wonderful, handsome lover who was his other half. A ying to his yang.

Those were the thoughts roaming around in the fire ghoul's head like a school of fish until he feels a warm hand on his face. Omega turns his cheek to face him, smirking. They were just basking in the warm, beautiful feeling of having slow and passionate sex. Alpha couldn't stop himself from being foolish in his perfect mind. He looked down at his mate with such loving eyes.

“You look sappy,” Omega comments, the smirk still on his face, though it disappears as Alpha moves his hips again. He sinks his sharp claws into Alpha’s broad, muscular back, soft sighs and little noises of pleasure leaving him while his mate rumbles deeply above him. Omega absolutely adored when Alpha was slow and sweet with him, his measured thrusts satisfying him in the bestest way possible, down to his very core.

“Do I look like that? I was just thinking…” the fire ghoul grunts, chanting his hips. “I was thinking about how much I love you, so maybe... you were right.” Alpha says, leaning down to connect their lips in a sloppy kiss. Omega moans into his mouth deeply, fluttering blue eyes up at him when they part. “You are too mushy... are you all right?” he grins, showing sharp teeth, before it turns into a cry of pleasure again as Alpha hits his sweet spot. The larger ghoul’s tail curls tightly around Alpha’s muscular bicep, hissing out that he is close.

Alpha keeps thrusting, causing Omega to make such wonderful noises as he snakes down a hand to finish him off. They come in tandem, twitching through their orgasms, and soon they are lying next to each other, trying to cool down. Omega rolls away, and Alpha snaps a growl at him in irritation. “Oh, shut up, you are like a furnace,” he mutters at the fire ghoul, amusement edging his tone. Alpha chuckles in response, reaching out to pet his fingers through his lover’s dirty locks of hair.

“We stink.” Alpha smirks, “Shower?” He asks, rolling on top of the other again and nipping at his face softly with sharp teeth. Omega hums, exhausted and clammy with sweat. “We should yeah.” The other ghoul mumbles, letting Alpha nip at him as he basks in all of the attention.

“Hey, are you all right?” Alpha says suddenly, breaking the blissful silence, cupping the quintessence ghoul’s face softly with a hand, thumb running over his cheeks. Omega felt way too warm for his liking. On top of that he was exhausted and irritated all day, but didn’t want to show it. He hushes Alpha with the gentlest of a smile, assuring his partner that he’s okay, and that he was only tired from the long week. The other isn’t entirely convinced, but he doesn’t push him further for an answer as they roll out of bed to go and have a much needed shower.

Alpha keeps a close eye on Omega for the rest of the night, until they fall asleep in each other’s arms, soft snores and purrs spilling quietly.

It doesn’t get better sadly. It gets worse.

**__**

It’s already into the morning when Alpha wakes. The sun was beaming rather highly in the clear skies of the new day. Often Omega is the one who wakes earlier, being a morning bird. Alpha wasn’t a morning person in the slightest and he absolutely despised when he had to wake up early. He found himself a tad bit surprised when his mate was still sleeping deeply next to him.

The fire ghoul snuggled closer to Omega, running his fingers down his cheek with a light touch. That was the very moment he froze, feeling his heart skip an entire beat in its cage before its pulse moved to his throat. The larger ghoul was pale; his skin felt like ice, and his breathing was so slow... Alpha chucked the blanket off instantly, brain on full adrenaline mode as he shook his mate’s shoulders gently, trying to wake him. “Hey...Omega?” He murmured, ocean eyes gleaming with pricks of anxiety.

Omega groaned, fluttering his eyes open. He looked sicker than a dog. His eyes had lost their striking crystal blue colour. He glanced at Alpha dumbly, gaze attempting to focus on his lover’s face desperately, his chapped lips in a thin line as he winces.

“What’s wrong?” Alpha starts, “Are you ill?” He adds worriedly. He has never seen any disease like this before, but truly, deep in his hellish senses, he could feel Omega was getting ill. That’s why he had been keeping a close eye on him the days before. The quintessence ghoul’s mannerisms told Alpha he wasn’t doing good, and to be entirely honest, his mate often forgot to look after himself in his work of curing others, especially during the height of yearly flu seasons. 

“I-I’m so cold…” Omega whispered, words stuttering, squinting his eyes to try and look at the other again. And Alpha felt that, that, every single type of heat and warmth had been chucked from his mate like some kind of horrible spirit sucked on his warmth. The fire ghoul curled around his mate, holding him close and pressing small kisses into his head, making some sort of attempt to keep him warm. Alpha was as heated as the sun afterall. “It’s okay, I’m here.” He mumbles into Omega’s curls, trying to keep his mate comforted. But honestly? He had zero idea of what was wrong with the other. He did his best to warm him up, however, that was the best he could do for now, keeping track of his shallow breathing in his mind.

Alpha turned over and reached for his phone that sat on the bedside table. After a few seconds of fumbling with the pass key, he managed to text Water to alert him about what was happening, and to ask for Air’s advice. If the oldest ghoul in the clergy couldn’t be of any help, then no one else would know what was wrong with Omega. Alpha knew Air wouldn’t own a phone; he was too old for that shit. Even Alpha had trouble learning how to use it, but he trusted Water. A tiny smile cracked on the fire ghoul’s face as he is looking at the screen, seeing a small bubble with three dots appear under his message, but his train of thought was interrupted by a whine.

Alpha shushed his mate. “It’s okay. Air will be here soon and he will help you,” He soothed, kissing his head again. He was afraid and he knew it, Omega never got sick, in fact none of the ghouls were ever sick. And what was going on was completely out of Alpha’s league.

“I’m sorry…” Omega rasped, turning his tired eyes to his mate. He shuddered again, snuggling into the warm body of Alpha even more. “Don’t say sorry, you’re just,” The fire ghoul pauses, and then continues, looking for words. “It can happen to anyone.” Alpha chides, brushing his mate’s hair back gently and tucking it behind his horns. “Where does it hurt, love?”

“Doesn’t hurt. I’m just so weak. And cold…” The larger ghoul whispers softly, turning even paler than before. Alpha’s feels his heart start to beat faster, fueled by the anger of being unable to help his mate. What was he good for, then? He felt more helpless than a newborn kit. But he pushes the feeling to the back of his mind, “It’s fine, I got you…” he murmurs, trying to attempt to soothe Omega again, stroking a hand through flaxen locks, rubbing the base of his lover’s horns.

They lay there for a long time, when suddenly, there’s a knock on the door. Alpha raises his head, shaking it before he growls something in response. Air opens the door, Water standing next to the latter. The older ghoul comes closer to the pair while the bassist stays behind, looking at Omega and wincing.

“What happened? “ Air asked, reaching down to touch Omega’s forehead with a palm. Quintessence ghouls weren’t known to catch any illnesses. They were powerful and their main tasks in the church were to heal...

Alpha’s lip twitched. “Nothing. He was feeling unwell days before, he woke up cold and shuddering, now he’s as weak as a kit,“ Alpha explained, baring his sharp fangs as Air touches his mate. “Careful-“ he snapped, a small huff of smoke escaping him. Water takes a few steps backwards at Alpha’s behaviour, until his back meets the door, his ears flattening.

Air shot the fire ghoul a sharp glare. “I am careful. Besides, you know me.” Air sighs softly, furrowing his thick brows. “Also, I can’t examine him if you are straight up lying on him.” He grumbled.

Alpha snarled under his breath, reluctantly moving away and standing a bit from the bed. It was just...he tended to be too protective. It was in his aggressive nature and he couldn’t help it, even if he sometimes got into trouble due to his hostility. But Omega loved him like this, and he even manages to hush him sometimes, keeping him from hurting himself and others. Omega, such a sweet, lovely mate.

A mate who might not recover…

Alpha rubbed at his eyes as Air examined Omega, turning his tired blue irises at Water. “Thanks for the assistance, kid,” He said suddenly, surprising even himself at that. He never said thank you to anyone. Water nodded, a grin appearing on his face. “Any time. As much as we like to bicker, I hate to see any of you hurting.” the water ghoul continued, gasping a bit and raising his brows as Alpha pats him on the shoulder.

Air stands, his face emotionless and stoic like a brick. Alpha looks at his mate’s pale face, and Omega shoots a little smile at him. “Be nice,” he chides, aware of the fact that Alpha is too harsh sometimes to their brothers. Alpha smiles back at him before it fade, turning his sights to Air. “What’s wrong with him?” He asks, fearing the worst from the other ghoul’s answer. Air looked partially defeated, “Honestly? I have no idea.” The tallest ghoul says simply, looking at the fire ghoul sternly. “This is too weird, like some kind of spirit is sucking the life out of him.” he adds quietly, continuing immediately at Alpha’s dumbstruck and horrified face. “But, I’m not sure! I have to read up on a few books, I’ve never seen anything like this before.” He continued before stopping before he got ahead of himself, releasing a deep sigh and pinching the bridge of his nose as he closed his pale gaze. “Just keep an eye on him, and tell me if he gets worse, okay?” The eldest grumbled, his eyes not saying anything promising for Alpha.

A single beat passed, then...

“You know, I’m still here and I’m completely able to tell how I feel, right?” Omega mused from the bed, eyes shining playfully. ‘ _At least he still has his wittiness’_ , Alpha thinks, fresh worry etching into his skin, bones and soul.

Air huffed a bit, “Yet,” He added seriously. “Air!” Water rebuked, rolling his eyes at his older brother, seeming a bit disapproving at his words. “Let’s go, I think we should let them rest,” the bassist mumbles, Alpha shooting him a thankful grin.

“Keep me updated on how he feels,” the keyboardist calls over his shoulder again as he exits with Water.

“Yes, ‘doctor Air’.” Alpha grimaces, the corner of his lip twitching a bit as he watches the door shut behind the pair. He turns back to his mate, taking in his sweet form. “Are you hungry? I can fetch something for you if you’d like.” he offers, even though he doesn’t want to leave Omega’s side not for a second.

“Not hungry,” Omega shakes his head, patting at the empty space next to him, “Come back to bed, love. Please?” he asks, fluttering washed-out blue eyes at his mate. He smiled weakly, holding up one clawed hand. Alpha hesitates briefly for a few moments, swallowing fear. “A minute. I’ll bring you some water.” He says quickly, moving off of their shared bed and disappearing into their bathroom and filling a glass for his mate. He passes it to Omega as he gets back, who chugs it down like he hasn’t gotten a drop of liquid in his system in months.

“Better.” Alpha purred, curling around Omega again, trying to keep him warm. Omega hums gently, nuzzling into Alpha’s warm chest. “My mate. So thoughtful…” He smiles, yawning and closing his eyes as he gets comfy, tail twining with Alpha’s own under the blanket. The fire ghoul kisses his head, his heart hurting with the poor image his mate made. “It’s going to be okay.” He whispers, rubbing his chin into Omega’s hair.

Omega smiles at that, slowly falling into a peaceful slumber as Alpha holds him close. The fire ghoul uses all of his power to generate heat and to help keep him warm and cosy.

**—**

The day passed. Alpha had gotten up eventually to bring some food back for them, Omega still napping most of the time. He hadn’t gotten better and he still felt cold, skin pale, and his eyes had lost their wise shine.

It was almost night time when there was a sudden knock on the door. Omega was still asleep and cuddled up next to Alpha. The fire ghoul has grunted in irritation at whoever is on the other side of the door. Couldn’t they leave them in peace? His mate was sick.

Another knock, and with a sigh of annoyance, Alpha got up from the bed and answered.

The door opened and Earth’s unmasked head peeks in, his big puppy-dog eyes and pout directed at the taller ghoul. “Can I come in?” He whispered. ‘ _Damned kid_ ,’ Alpha thought, he knew how to soften anyone. He nods, yawning. He was at the brink of falling asleep himself. “Be quiet,” he whispers back, he didn’t want to wake his mate.

Earth enters and closes the door behind him quietly, and even that was enough for Omega to wake. He moves and turns to his side, yawning so wide that his jaw pops. He looks at Earth confused until Alpha starts to rub his fingers on the base of his horn. Omega began to purr at that, resting back against the warm bed.

Earth takes a place on the mattress, sitting at Omega’s leg. “I heard you are sick, and I wanted to check on you,” he mumbles, unaware if Alpha was mad at him or not. He gets his answer when the fire ghoul reaches out his other hand to ruffle the small one’s hair. Earth giggles at the touch.

“I’m still here and in one piece as you can see,” Omega answers, smiling at their youngest brother warmly. Earth was always worried about everyone and was a bit too clingy, but they all loved him for that. He had empathy. The drummer nods, yawning too. “Are you tired, little one?” Omega chuckles heartily.

Earth tells them about his day, what kind of work he did, and that he polished his entire drum kit. Alpha asks if he cleaned their guitars too, but Omega scolds him for that, the small drummer chuckling at them bickering like an old married couple.

“Come on, little one,” Alpha says suddenly as they stop talking, opening up the blanket. Earth, who is already wearing a sort of sleeping clothes, smiles gratefully as he crawls between them, cuddling into Omega’s broad chest. “Careful,” the fire ghoul rumbles.

“Alpha,” Omega rolls his eyes “I’m not made of glass you know,” he chuckled back, albeit weakly, letting the youngest snuggle into him. “There,” the quintessence ghoul soothes. “Comfy?” He asks, and Earth nods. “Thank you,” the smaller ghoul mumbles as he closes his eyes, Omega smiling brightly at their tiny brother.

“Fuck Earth, you’re just like our kit. If we wanted one, we should just adopt you.” Alpha chuckles, pulling the blanket over them all, curling an arm around the drummer. “I wouldn’t oppose it.” Omega added, shooting one last loving look at his mate before he closes his eyes too. Alpha has a soft smirk on his face as they fall into a light sleep, Earth already snoring quietly between them.

**—**

Time passes. It’s very late into the night by now, the moon in a thin crescent, like a cat’s claw piercing the veil of blues and black. Alpha is startled awake by being kicked in his abdomen by Earth for at least the tenth or twelfth time already. He groans in the dull pain from the bruises starting to well up, shifting in the bed to face the drummer fully, and extracting knees from his own ribs. Earth doesn’t wake, and Omega is still asleep too. Alpha looks at his mate worriedly; face half lit by the moonlight seeping through their window. He is paler and his breathing is shallow again.

As much as he hated to do it, Alpha shakes Earth awake to shoo him from their bed. Omega was sick and they would certainly let Earth sleep there any other time but now. The small ghoul wakes groggily, looking at Alpha with wide, worried eyes. “What’s wrong?” He whispered.

“You should go back to your room,” Alpha chides quietly, he doesn’t point out why, even though he can feel that Earth understands. Strangely enough, Omega doesn’t wake from all the moving and whispering. The drummer nods as he turns his head to look at Omega, long hair messed up and caught on his horns. “Come on,” Alpha stands and Earth follows him.

The fire ghoul grabs a spare blanket from the dresser, curling it around his sibling neatly. “There, you can come back any time tomorrow, we just have to let him rest, okay?” he explains, glancing back at Omega. Earth looks up at him, with a bit of...fear? “It’s okay. Goodnight brother.” He whispers softly as he turns to leave, being extremely careful to not shut the door loudly behind him.

Alpha watches him leave, then he gets back into bed, curling around his mate. It was that very moment his heart skipped a beat again, because Omega wasn’t breathing. He was still as the freshly dead, skin pale as the moon shining in. “Omega…?” Alpha whispers, his throat choking and restricting with the rising fear that was building up in his gut. His mate doesn’t answer. Alpha shakes his shoulders, trying to wake him, kissing over his face in panic and desperation when that doesn’t work. But Omega doesn’t wake, doesn’t open his eyes, and his lips stay quiet. “Omega!” Alpha screams, his voice cracking and filled with fresh, rising waves sorrow and pain. But even that is not enough to bring his mate back.

Alpha’s heart snapped into pieces like glass falling onto stone, hot tears spilling down his cheeks and disappearing in Omega’s hair as he held him close. His head swam with fog and grief, it felt like someone had taken a hammer to it. His chest rattled and heaved with thick sobs, usually steady hands trembling with mourning. Life was cruel once more with him, because there was no new beginning without an end. Alpha wailed even more, choking on spit as agony fills his being, holding his dear mate close to his heart.

Through the stained glass window, the clouds covered the moon…

**Author's Note:**

> Stay tuned for the next chapters!


End file.
